Imagine that you are sitting among several hundred people, and you realize you need help, not necessarily imminent life-threatening help, just some help. You decide to stand up and shout so loud that everyone can hear you say: “I need help!” What just happened? Are you now thinking and feeling, “that would never happen!” If you are, we want you to know that you are among friends. As fear-based pack animals, homo sapiens are generally afraid of standing out of the “pack” often because they’re concerned with not being good enough.
Fear of condescending looks, smirks of contempt, or degrading comments like — “Are you afraid?” or “Handle it yourself you weak coward!” — are among a seemingly endless list of potential outcomes that terrify us to behave differently than others do or than they might expect us to. For most of us, it is part of our human nature to want to “fit in.” We want to be worthy of the pack; to be good enough to be part of the pack. This can automatically make us feel like we are worthy of love, and what’s more, to feel – loved. These feelings and behavioral inclinations which originate at the lowest levels of our psyche often drive how we ultimately act. Targeting and entraining this area of the psyche to feel worthy is a critical component in the Neural Empowerment program — the process of reparenting our cells.
This is why it takes true courage to “stand up” or “stand out” and – ask for help. Despite all the evidence to the contrary, many still view asking for help as a cowardly act, and yet, the reality is it takes real courage to take the risk and admit that we cannot do it on our own. This is especially true if the area we need help with is related to a theme that makes us feel less worthy or less important than others. Feeling judged as less than is often one of the most difficult feelings to process. It is considerably worse if we feel we are being judged by someone who is supposed to accept and love us unconditionally.
The simple truth is that we are all worthy of love – no matter what. True love is free of conditions. The more we reparent ourselves to know that we are deserving of true unconditional love, the more comfortable we become with asking for help. The more comfortable we become with asking for help, the stronger the feeling that we are deserving of true unconditional love becomes. Where does this path ultimately lead? It leads to a healthier relationship with ourselves and others.
— Geoff Cole